Wednesday, April 20, 2011

You know it's gonna be bad when...

1.  You drive up to a calving call and see the cow haltered to a fencepost and the calf (partway protruding from the cow) attached by chains to the front of the tractor.

2.  An emergency phone call begins with "My horse's penis is swollen and he won't let me touch it."

3.  You come home after a long day at work and both of your dogs come bounding toward you but they smell so bad you have to run in the opposite direction...and they think it's a game and they tackle you and now you smell just as bad as they do.


4.  You happily find that your husband has started the laundry before you got home...but none of your dirty clothes are in it.

5.  You start pulling calf from #1 and realize that it has been dead for a couple of days and is now a balloon-calf full of noxious gases produced by degrading bacteria and it may explode in your arms at any second.

6.  The kitchen is a mess, the laundry is only half begun (see #4), and there is a pile of dirty coveralls on the front porch. 

7.  You realize tick season is officially in full swing when you pick off at least a half a dozen from patients at work and then find one crawling up your arm when you get home.

8.  The "tree house" that the previous homeowners left in the back yard tumbles down in the windstorm and Bella and George discover all the wonderful treasures inside...and proceed to destroy them, strewing the pieces across the front yard.

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